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Save the Date Rewrite
(Starts with Lincoln at school sitting with his friends at the lunch table trying to get something out of his pants. It eventually comes out, and it's a sloppy joe with a note on it.) Classmate #4:(Reading the note) Happy Sloppy Joe Tuesday, Lame-o. Signed, Ronnie-Anne. (he says her name with flair) Classmate #3: And there's a heart! Classmate #1, #2, #3, #4, & #5: Ooooooooo! Lincoln's got a girlfriend! Lincoln: What?! No I don't. Classmate #3: When's the wedding day, Lincoln? (The classmates, including Clyde, laugh) Lincoln: Ha-ha. Very funny, guys. Classmates: Ronnie and Lincoln sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. (They start laughing again) Lincoln: Guys, Ronnie-Anne is NOT my girlfriend. She's rude and gross and totally annoying. I'd rather lick the bathroom floor than kiss that weirdo. (A gasp is heard, and it turns out it came from Ronnie-Anne. Lincoln turns around and is shocked to see her.) Lincoln: Ronnie-Anne! (Ronnie-Anne at first shocked but then puts on an angry scowl and storms out of the lunch room with her food tray in her hands.) Clyde: Whoa, Lincoln. I think you really hurt her feelings. Lincoln: C'mon, Clyde, Ronnie-Anne is the toughest girl at school. She'll be fine. (Later that day, Lincoln comes home after school.) Lori: YOU MONSTER! (she screams, throwing a tissue box at Lincoln.) Lincoln: Ow! What was that for? Lori: You made Ronnie-Anne CRY! Lincoln: Cry? I didn't mean to! Wait, how do you know? (Lori tries to aim a teddy bear at Lincoln, but he jumps out of the way before it hits him.) Lori: Bobby told me...(starts to cry) RIGHT BEFORE HE BROKE UP WITH ME!! Lincoln: What? Why does Bobby care? (Lori throws a couch cushion at Lincoln, prompting him to duck;she opens a photo album showing a picture of Bobby and Ronnie-Anne together.) Lori: Because, Bobby is literally Ronnie-Anne's brother! He said he could never date someone related to someone who hurt someone he's related to! Or something like that! Lincoln: Ronnie-Anne has a brother? I thought she was raised by trolls. (Lori throws a bunch of CDs in rapid fire fashion; Lincoln shields himself with the cushion.) Lori: D'AAAAHH!! THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT BOBBY WAS TALKING ABOUT! (Lori chases after Lincoln, who hides behind the chair; he trips, and Lori catches him and holds him up by his shirt.) Lori: You have to make thinf right with Ronnie-Anne! Lincoln: Okay! Okay! I'll call her right now and apologize! (picks up the phone) Lori: NO (hangs up the phone) Nuh-uh! Actions speak louder than words! Bobby has to see you being nice to her. That's the only way he'll get back together with me! Which is why we're going on a double date! Lincoln: WHAT?! Lori: It's all been arranged! We have a reservation at Jean Juan's French-Mex Buffet at six! AND YOU! WILL MAKE HER! FEEL! LIKE THE MOST SPECIAL GIRL! IN THE WORLD! Lincoln:(gags) I'd rather lick the bathroom... (Lori picks up the end table and threatens to crush him with it.) Lincoln: I'll go iron my khakis! (runs out of the scene. Up in his bedroom, Lincoln gives Clyde a call on his walkie-talkie.) Clyde, I need your help. Clyde: What's up, Lincoln? Lincoln: I have to go on a double date at Jean Juan's French-Mex Buffet with Ronnie-Anne. Clyde: Ohh, I love fusion cuisine! But why? Lincoln: Because, you were right. I did hurt her feelings, she told Bobby, and he broke up with Lori, and Lori's making me--(hears nothing but static on his walkie-talkie.) Clyde? Clyde? (Clyde doesn't answer him because, he is dancing in front of a gold-framed portrait of Lori with a spotlight shining on it.) Clyde: Clyde and Lori sitting in a tree/Oh there's no room for dumb Bobby! Woo! (Later, the two pairs of siblings arrive at the restaurant. Lori and Bobby look to see each other, but their respective siblings don't.) Lori: Hi, Bobby Bobby: Hey babe--I mean, Lori. (Ronnie-Anne rolls her eyes.) Lincoln: Hi, Ronnie-Anne. (Lori heavily nudges him) You're looking lovely this evening. Ronnie-Anne: Yeah, we weirdos clean up nice. Let's just get this over with. (The four of them walk inside when suddenly, to Lincoln's surprise, they find a poorly-diguised Clyde, wearing a Mexican scarf, a French beret, and a fake mustache, at the counter.) Clyde: Good evening, Monjour et Senoritas. Welcome to Jean Juan's French-Mex Buffet! Lincoln:(pulls Clyde towards him) Clyde, what are you doing!? Bobby:(noticing the bowl of mints situated on the counter.) Ohh, mints! (eats one) Clyde:(growls jealously at Bobby and then turns his attention back to his best friend.) Just here to help you, buddy. Lincoln: I know what you're up to. Please don't mess this up for me. Clyde: Don't worry. You won't even know I'm here! (But just as Clyde steps back onto the phone book he was standing on, he knocks the counter over and spills the bowl os mints, startling Lincoln and making Lori jump into Bobby's arms. As Bobby puts Lori down, a waiter slips on the mints and crashes offscreen, sendinf a mask rolling away from where he crashed.) Clyde: So, table for three? Bobby: Actually, there are four-- Clyde:(ignoring his rival) Very good. Three. Right this way. (He brings Lincoln, Lori, and Ronnie-Anne to their table, and then pulls up a chair for Lori as he calls her...) Ma'amsellita. (Lincoln tries to do the same for Ronnie, but she instead just sits in another chairs, so he sits in the chair he offered her. Bobby approaches their table.) Bobby: Wow, table blankets? Pretty romantic. Lori: I know. Isn't it? Bobby: I mean, whatever. it's fine. (Clyde suddenly pulls away the table's last chair.) Hey, thanks, man. (He prepares to sit down, thinking Clyde has pulled up the chair for him, but instead Clyde walks away with the chair and Bobby end sup hitting the floor with a thud.) Ow! Hey, wait! (He pulls a nearby potted plant to use as a seat. Lincoln, not sure of what to say right no, looks at Ronnie-Anne, who's still scowling at him. but she is then suddenly started by the appearance of a Mexican band.) Musician: Ooh, la la! Young amour! This calls for... musica! (But before he and his two companions can peform...) Lincoln: No, no! Please, no musica. (The three musicians dejectedly walk away.) ...So, I hear the Quiche Rancheros is excellent. (His attempt at small talk does not appear to have done him any good;Ronnie-Anne is still scowling at him.) Clyde:(comes up with three glasses of water and gives two of them to Lincoln and Ronnie-Anne.) Two flat water...(gives the third one to Lori.) ...and one sparkling, to match your eyes. Bobby:(taps Clyde's shoulder) Uh, could I get a water? (Clyde just ignores him again and walks off, to his annoyance.) And maybe a chair? (One clockwise screen-wipe later, Lincoln is still trying to get back on Ronnie's good side.) Lincoln: So, how about that math test? I mean, "show your work?" What is that? (Bobby and Lori just quietly chew their food when Clyde suddenly comes back with a silver plate.) Clyde: If I may...(lifts the cover so that he slams it in Bobby's face.) ...a special treat for a special lady - a nacho from Jean Juan's private collection! Bobby and Lori:(simultaneously) I think I'll hit the buffet again. Lori:(gasps as Clyde gets a disillusioned look on his face.) We both said the same thing at the exact same time! It's like we're literally meant to be. (Clyde can only watch forlornly as his unrequited crush and his rival walk off to the buffet, so he vents his frustrations by punching the nacho down on the plate he's holding and storms off.) Lincoln:(imitating Lori) "It's like we're literally meant to be." Ronnie-Anne:(giggles) Oh, they're so cheesy! Lincoln:(also giggles) Yeah, Yeah! Cheesier than this Fromage Con Queso! Ronnie-Anne:(laughs) Oh, remember that time Bobby thought store-brought flowers were too "impersonal", so he picked his own? Lincoln: Yeah, and they turned out to be poison ivy! Lori swelled up like a salted turkey! (As they share a laugh over this, the camera zooms over to their older siblings watching from the buffet.) Bobby: Aw, look, they're getting along! Lori: Does that mean...? (Lincoln stops laughing as he sees Bobby taking Lori's hands in his.) Bobby: Babe, this has been torture! Lori: Oh, Bobby Boo-Boo Bear! (They pucker up to kiss, but Clyde comes between them and ruins the moment.) Clyde: Hot raw tamales, comin' through! Lincoln: Ugh, the nicknames! Ronnie-Anne: I know. And don't get me started on the kissing. It's so gross! Who does that!? Lincoln: Yeah, and how about all the selfies? (Ronnie-Anne chuckles and then puts her arm around him while lifting out her other arm as if she's taking a selfie right now as he imitates Lori again.) "Don't get my bad side, Bobby!" Ronnie-Anne:(imitating Bobby) "You don't have a bad side, babe." Click, click, click! (they laugh some more.) Lincoln: You know, I'm really sorry for what I said at school. Ronnie-Anne: It's okay. Sorry about the sloppy joe. (They both give heartfelt smiles at each other when suddenly their older siblings come back with their arms around each other.) Lori: Guess who's back together? Lincoln and Ronnie-Anne:(simultaneously and with sarcasm) Babe and Bobby Boo-Boo Bear? Lori: Yes! Wheeee! Reunion selfie! (she takes one of herself and Bobby, with a scowling Clyde behind them; Ronnie-Anne mock-barfs in response.) Lincoln: Heh! (suddenly, he looks behind him to see that his five classmates who were teasing him at the beginnign have just arrived at the restaurant.) Classmate #3's Mom: I'll be beck to pick you boys up. Classmate #3: OKay, mom (As Ronnie-Anne laughs again, Lincoln quickly hides under the table.) Ronnie-Anne: What are you doing? Lincoln: Just, uh, dropped my fork. (crawls under the table, startling Lori and Bobby.) Lori: Lincoln, where are you going!? Lincoln: Uh, bathroom. I hope on one else had the Chile Con Escargots! (he dashes for the men's room and locks himself in.) Phew! I'll just hang out here till those guys leave. Musician:(appearing behind Lincoln with his two companions.) Musica! Lincoln: No, no! No musica. Customer:(pounding the door from outside) Hurry up! I gotta escargo! (Lincoln groans, unlocks the door and dashes out while the customer dashes in.) Musician: Uno, dos, trois! (he and his band start playing) (Outside the restroom, Lincoln sees that his classmates are still here.) Classmate #1: Well, I gotta pee. (As classmate #1 heads for the restrooms, Lincoln quickly ducks under a food cart containing the dessert tray.) Clyde:(comes out of the kitchen, talking on his cell phone, and starts pushing the cart.) Hello, Dr. Lopez? I know I'm supposed to call you at home, but it's a Lori emergency. Lincoln:(pulls Clyde by his collar) Clyde! You gotta get me out of here! Clyde: What? Why? (Lincoln points to the laughing calssmates at their table.) Classmate #1:(returning) Guys, there's a band in the bathroom! Lincoln: I can't let those guys see me on a "date" with Ronnie-Anne. I just convinced them she's not my girlfriend. Clyde: I gotcha, buddy. Just stay under there and I'll wheel you out. (into his phone) Dr. Lopez, I'll cal you back. (wheels the cart past the classmates' table just when...) Classmate #4: Hey, dessert guy! Clyde: Crud! (wheels the cart up to their table.) Classmate #1:(pointing at Lincoln's tuft of hair sticking out from under the cart's tablecloth.) Ooh, what's that with the whipped cream on top? (Lincoln quickly ducks so that his hair tuft is not sticking out.) Clyde: Uh, sorry, that's a to-go order. (Classmate #1 pulls the cloth back only to see nothing under it.) See? It's gone. (Lincoln dashes for the entrance, but suddenly runs into the Mexican band again.) Musician: Musica! Lincoln: NO! No musica. Silencio! (ducks into a nearby closet) Clyde:(comes in with the dessert cart.) Lincoln? (Lincoln pulls him into the closet with him.) How are we gonna get you out now? We'll need a diguise. Lincoln:(pulls out an oversized mask of a Mexican man.) I'm way ahead of you! (Clyde just lowers his eyelids at Lincoln's imitation of Luan. One screen-wipe later, Lincoln, wearing the mask, is on the shoulders of Clyde, who has hidden his face with his scarf, but is not keeping his own arms hidden.) Clyde: Adios! Au revoir! Gracias! Merci! Lincoln: Okay, Clyde, less talking, more walking. We're almost out! Lori: We need our check. Where's that cute little waiter? Clyde: She thinks I'm cute? I gotta get that check for Lori! (dashes off, causing Lincoln to fall off his shoulders and drop the mask.) Lincoln: Clyde, no! Wait! (Too late, his classmates have spotted him.) Classmate #4: Hey Lincoln. Whatcha doing at Jean Juan's French-Mex Buffet? Lincoln: I'm just here with my family. I mean, friends. I, I mean, family friends. Classmate #4: Isn't that Ronnie-Anne? Lincoln: No! I mean, maybe. I didn't know she was here. Classmate #4: Hey, are those khakis? Gasp! You're wearing date pants! Classmate #3: I knew it! Ronnie-Anne ''is ''your girlfriend! (he and the others laugh) (Lincoln suddenly turns his face red) Lincoln: SHUT UP! (Classmates was shocked along with customers includes Lori, Bobby, Ronnie-Anne and Clyde by Lincoln's outburst) Lincoln:(enraged) THAT'S IT! YOU GUYS LAUGHING AT ME? THEN FINE AND YOU THINK RONNIE-ANNE IS MY GIRLFRIEND? THEN NO, WE'RE JUST FRIENDS! AND ALSO I CAN'T THIS ANYMORE! SO I'M LEAVING! (Lincoln is about to leave when Ronnie-Anne tries to catch up with him.) Ronnie-Anne: Hey... (Lincoln quickly turns around in anger which startles Ronnie-Anne and left the restaurant and the whole restaurant were silent.) Lori: Lincoln! Wait! (runs out the restaurant and catches up to Lincoln) Listen, Lincoln, I just want it to... (Lincoln turns around in anger) Lincoln:(angry) YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL ME ABOUT THAT SITUATION Lori: Woah, Lincoln, calm down... Lincoln:(still angry) YOU CALM DOWN ME, IT'S BECAUSE, I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THAT I ACCIDENTLY INSULT RONNIE-ANNE, THEN YOU WERE FORCING ME TO GO ON A DOUBLE DATE IN ORDER TO GO BACK WITH BOBBY AND THEN MY CLASSMATES ARRIVED AND TEASING ME ABOUT RONNIE-ANNE IS MY GIRLFRIEND BUT SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND THAT I TOLD THEM ABOUT THAT!! AND GUESS WHAT IF YOU EVER THREATENING ME ABOUT THAT SITUATION EVER AGAIN, THEN I WILL NEVER TALK TO YOU EVER AGAIN!!! AND GOODBYE!! (Lincoln walked away in anger) Lori:(Gets a tear in her eye) Lincoln! (But Lincoln ignores Lori which makes her knee down in sadness) Lori:(sniffs) What of my done! (Bobby and Ronnie-Anne comes out and comforts Lori) Bobby: Gee Lori (hugs Lori) I'm sorry that I break up with you and I see Lincoln was really angry at you. Ronnie-Anne:(gets a teary eye) I feel this is my fault! Bobby: Come on, Ronnie-Anne, don't be feel sad about that! Ronnie-Anne: I am sad, okay Lori:(sniffs;voice breaking) What should I do Bobby? Lincoln is very angry at me for forcing him to go on a double date with me. (Bobby gets an idea) Bobby: I got an idea (Later, Lincoln comes home with an angry face and went into his room;slams the door and lays on his bed;look at the ceiling.) Clyde:(On walkie talkie) Lincoln, are you here? (Lincoln picks up walkie talkie) Lincoln:(sighs) Yeah, I'm here Clyde: Man, I see your angry! I'm sorry that double date won't too well. Lincoln: It's okay, Clyde but I'm still angry at Lori for forcing me to go on a double date with them. Clyde: Well I see you still angry at...Lori (sighs then angry growl) Bobby! Lincoln:(annoyed) Clyde! Clyde: Oh sorry, now I gotta go, bye Lincoln: Bye, Clyde (Puts down walkie talkie and hears a knock) Lincoln: It's open (Bobby opens it) Lincoln:(surprised) Bobby! What are you doing here? Bobby: I'm here to tell that situation, bro. Lincoln: What's that? Bobby: Look you that I broke up with Lori earliar because, of your classmate make fun of you about Ronnie-Anne is your girlfriend and I see you are angry at them and Lori and I know how you feel. Lincoln: Really? Bobby: Yeah. Lincoln: Thanks. (Lori and Ronnie-Anne comes in) Lincoln:(indifferent tone) What do you want? Lori: Look, I'm sorry for that situation between your classmate and us Ronnie-Anne: Me too Lori: Can you forgive me? Lincoln:(thinking about it and then...) I forgive you and I'm sorry for yelling Lori: It's okay (They hugged together) Lincoln:(To the viewers) And we need is...Musica! (Musicians came in) Musician: MUSICA! (Musicians play music and Lori, Bobby, Lincoln and Ronnie-Anne begin tangoing) THE END Category:Re-writes Category:Re-Writes Category:Episode Re-Writes